Secret Diaries of Him (part 2) 

Friends requests were sent to him and a few people on his friends list. Next day it was accepted and with it a message. “Do you know our family or are you random?” I replied just random. I think we chatted a bit. 

He was married with some kids. No biggie it’s just chatting innit. He asked about me. I said I was at Dundee uni studying dentistry. Originally from Germany. (Oh shush! I just said what came into my head!) 
Later that evening I noticed he had unfriended me. I thought oh well that was short lived 😂 but that night he messages asking if I want to play Fb poker. I said sure but he had to add me again to play.  
While playing I noticed his wife was in the game too…. He said she’s sending you a request just add her. I’m like ok fine the more the merrier. Little did I know that I was gonna regret this later on. 
At some point she comes on my wall and very arrogantly claims my dp is fake. I told her to shut up and get lost. Turns out the pic I was using was some famous Pakistani actress 😳 how careless was I! (I’ve got smarter since then) 
Then she later comes into my inbox and starts chatting away and being extremely nice… And suggests we chat on the phone… Another mistake I’d live to regret… 
Tbc

Your beautiful spirit

When life gives you a few knocks we get up brush ourselves off and get on with it. But once we are knocked down again and again, getting up each time becomes more and more difficult. Our spirit becomes broken, egos become deflated and our heart begins to lose hope. Where do we go from here? How do I cope or survive? But there’s that little thing inside you that never gives up, you know as long as you’ve got a little bit of fight left inside you, it’s enough to keep getting you up and keep you moving on.

One of the greatest supports are the people around you. While it may be difficult to reach out to someone, somehow there’s always that one person who reaches out to you, without even trying or knowing. It’s like the most natural thing in the world them just being there holding you up with their own spirit and strength. Their one sentence can hold more power than the words of a hundred people. An emotional connection is born without you even realising it. A physical connection becomes trivial as the mind and heart starts to bond. Soon before you know it, in the crowd that’s the only person you see, everyone else just falls away. It’s only them you hear calling your name, talking to you, smiling laughing with you. No one else exists in your thoughts or mind. Wherever you turn or look they are there with you every step of the way. Sharing every waking moment with you and then in every sleeping moment too. Stepping into your dreams like they belong there, being everything you needed and wanted them to be. Consuming you, intoxicating you, becoming you. You wake up as one, sweet smiles cross your face for the rest of the day and you can’t wait once again to fall asleep and be theirs again and they yours. It’s in your dreams you dream dreams. And when you’re awake your reality becomes a dream. Before you know it they are your every step, breath, every thought and every waking moment.

When did they seep into your blood and sweat? You can hear them, smell them, feel them,yet it’s only their spiritual presence you’re intoxicated by and you are not your own anymore. You belong to another without giving yourself, planning it or wanting it. What’s happened to you? Do you even know? Do you realise you are glowing? Smiling? Laughing? What’s happened to you? they ask and some just tell you. Your shyness shows and you feel coy. You need a private moment to collect your thoughts and you wonder could it be true or even possible that this is happening to you. And you start to think and remember those little moments when with each word and gesture they touched your heart and began to melt it and mould it with their own. You panic a little, you fear a little that you’ve lost control lost yourself and didn’t even know it. You try to compose yourself but your heart is beating with joy and it takes over all your fears and thoughts and you know your heart is now in control. You know it’s pointless trying to fight this or think logically. And do you want to? No you don’t. You’re loving this feeling now of belonging somewhere being someone’s and not feeling alone.

And the most beautiful part is they don’t know yet that the beauty shining within you and the warm glow in your heart is because of them… Your journey into the abyss isn’t complete, no not yet. Your story is incomplete!

Your story has just begun….

The bigger plan

We take so much in life for granted that we never realise that some of these things can be taken away in an instant. Even through no fault of our own we can lose something that we didn’t even know was so precious to us till it’s gone. Some things lost or gone can never be regained yet it can shape and destine our future forever. Perhaps one day we will come to understand and know what the bigger plan was. Maybe it’s bigger than any of us can ever imagine but one things for sure God gives the toughest battles to his strongest soldiers.

What is love?

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Just couldn’t resist posting this, so sweet and cute!

5 things you need to start doing today to live a happier life

This is a guest post from Sharn Khaira.

It was 2.30am on a cold Thursday January morning. We received a call, the kind of call that I wouldn’t even wish upon even my greatest enemy.
The call was from India. My cousin who was just 37 years of age, married 4 years and a father of a 2 year old little girl had just died in his sleep. Just like that he was taken away from us in one split second. It’s a simple as that, one minute you’re here and the next minute you’re gone.
At first when I got woken up by my mum I thought she had mistaken my cousin for someone else. She knocked on my door in the middle of the night and looked shocked and upset, still coming to terms with what she had just heard. My heart beat so fast as I was trying to find out what the hell was going on. Nothing made sense. After all he was fit and healthy and had no health issues. I just couldn’t believe it. When she said those words out loud that he had passed away. I can’t describe to you the pain I felt. As if someone had literally ripped my heart out and split it into two. We were so close, spending each Christmas together when he lived in the UK. It felt like I was in some sort of sick nightmare. Myself and my mum sobbed inconsolably. Surely this couldn’t be true?
Oh it was. I rang India to find out for myself. My cousin picked up the phone and she was crying uncontrollably. I found out that he had died in his sleep with a brain haemorrhage, with his wife and daughter next to his side. She had no clue. He wasn’t even in any pain, he just slipped away peacefully to the heaven’s.
Ever since that day I have been questioning everything. My complete life. How I interact with people, how I live my life and who my friends and enemies are. Above all, what do I want out of my life? I’ve always known, and it’s been said time and time again that life is too short but if there was some sort of sick example I had definitely been shown it. Life really is too short. To think one day you won’t actually wake up, and this is true of everyone in the world.
Since that day I have been thinking that if tomorrow was my last day what regrets would I have? What would I do more of? Who would I have wanted to see more of? A few thoughts came to my mind.
I’m an ambitious entrepreneur and sometimes I get so bogged down in my demanding job and work schedule that I even get “too busy” to reply to a text to a loved one. Again because of my business I don’t spend near as much time as I should with my family and friends as I’m always “too busy” working. I become too obsessed with chasing the money/dollar trying to become successful and making a name for myself. I mean yes money is important but in the end we are going to the same place so we can’t take it with us.
The truth is in this 21st Century Britain us British Asians have just simply become “too busy”. Too busy with our kids, too busy with our career or too busy hustling. We just don’t seem to have enough time for our loved ones. But then isn’t that what life is about. Cherishing those beautiful moments with the people you love most?
Of course it is. But that sounds so simplistic. But it is simple. If you get rid of all the drama and negative energy that weighs you down, then life should be about that.
For that reason I have made 5 rules which I will try and abide by moving forward. Because if I do die tomorrow, I will have the least amount of regrets from my side:

1) Spend more time with your friends and family. Because in the end that’s what really matters. Try and see them at least every few months or what your schedule permits. It can be difficult with family that perhaps don’t live in the same city as you but make a conscious effort to see them or even pick up the phone.

2) Do more things that you LOVE. I don’t know about you but sometimes I just love doing nothing! Lounging around in my pj’s eating junk food and watching Sex and the City. Due to my tight work schedule and my side business I very rarely get to do this. But now I’ve realised it’s really important to do this at least once a month. I’ll sure be doing this in February!

3) Stop being a control freak. I’m an utter control freak. I have everything planned out so I know exactly what I’m doing and when I’m doing it. But with my cousin passing away I’ve realised that we DON’T have everything in control. Sure we can map out days and weeks but life is what happens when we’re busy making plans. Things aren’t in control so just relax.

4) Travel more. The world is such a big beautiful place. 7 continents, 196 countries and god knows how many languages. I think we do get bogged down in our little world in our tiny little city and forget that the world is a big place. I’m planning on doing lots more travelling this year to Europe. Take time out and experience the world, after all you only live once.

5) Work on being the best you can be. I’m unhappy with my weight. Always have been. Not that I’m obese or anything but I want a body that I’m proud of. That’s why I have decided I will get the body I WANT this year. I’m going to be working on being the best I can be so I have no regrets.
If there is anything you take from this post, make sure you have no regrets and live life to the fullest.
In the end, it’s not going to matter how many breaths you took, but how many moments took your breath away

– shing xiong

This post was written by Sharn Khaira, who has set up http://www.indian-connect.co.uk, an online community where Sikhs and Hindus from the UK can connect with each other.

I’m always inside you

Is it helping
The silence, The emptying
Of your soul

Does it feel good
The emptiness? The loneliness
Your heart so cold?

Do you ignore it? Or push it
To the back of your head

Or do you wish
Somewhere, all the feelings were
Gone from inside, dead.

When you wake up
In the morning and realise
I’m still here and so is she
Inside my head….

I’m back

Hi guys! Sorry it’s been such a long time since I last posted.

First a young family member was taken ill, while we knew she would be ok dealing with that and the effects of her medication was the hardest part.

Then I went on a very emotional and spiritual journey to Saudia Arabia. It was one of the most amazing experiences I’ve had. This is a country that is the focus for all Muslims but its also one of the most controversial ones too. Especially with its strict shariah laws and ways of dealing with its crime.

Ramadan is here too and today is our first day of fast. Means also I have some time to post and catch up on what you guys have been up to. ( I’m not cooking 10 meals a day…. Yippeee )

So good news is you will be hearing a lot more from me now on.

Yes… It’s true… I’m back 🙂