Friends requests were sent to him and a few people on his friends list. Next day it was accepted and with it a message. “Do you know our family or are you random?” I replied just random. I think we chatted a bit.
He was married with some kids. No biggie it’s just chatting innit. He asked about me. I said I was at Dundee uni studying dentistry. Originally from Germany. (Oh shush! I just said what came into my head!)
Later that evening I noticed he had unfriended me. I thought oh well that was short lived 😂 but that night he messages asking if I want to play Fb poker. I said sure but he had to add me again to play.
While playing I noticed his wife was in the game too…. He said she’s sending you a request just add her. I’m like ok fine the more the merrier. Little did I know that I was gonna regret this later on.
At some point she comes on my wall and very arrogantly claims my dp is fake. I told her to shut up and get lost. Turns out the pic I was using was some famous Pakistani actress 😳 how careless was I! (I’ve got smarter since then)
Then she later comes into my inbox and starts chatting away and being extremely nice… And suggests we chat on the phone… Another mistake I’d live to regret…
Id made the fake account on Facebook to try and see if Raj was upto no good because lately he’d been distant and not talking much. Call it paranoia or wherever it was really starting to get to me. One should never do internet relationships but hell little did I know I was about to enter another that would consume the next five years of my life.
The fake account was ready I’d called her Rosie and given her a very eye catching picture. She’d defo catch Raj’s eye once I’d put her in the right places. All I now needed was a few Fb buddies to make the account look real.
I sent a few random requests and then one guy in particular caught my eye. He was American and the idea that he was in a different time zone seemed perfect. If we got chatting he’d be around when my other buddies weren’t late at night. It would mean I’d always have someone to chat to when I’m bored. Friend request sent to Nawaz Ahmed….
Haven’t been on in a while as you guys will have noticed. Life just took a different direction. I also ended up in this Facebook group and ended up running it. Now I own my group which kinda keeps me busy too. I’m gonna be here more often because my head is full of so much stuff that I need to talk about.
If we all could choose to be anyone we wanted to be who would we choose? Or what would we want to be? Or could we simply think “no this is who I am and I’m sticking with it!”
I recently came across something disturbing and realised that as much as we think we know someone how well do we know them? When we doubt their authenticity and its being denied do we trust our instincts or do we choose to trust the very person we doubt?
I think I knew from day one that all was not right. But decided to give the benefit of doubt. I didn’t really care to be honest. After all Internet friendships/relationships come with certain elements of fantasies and extravaganza. So what the hell if someone wants to pretend they are someone or something else.
But as time goes you get tired of the pretence. It gets to the stage you just want a little bit of genuineness and some honesty. For someone to just take your friendship seriously and respect you enough to reveal their true selves. To know and trust you when you say “I know, but it doesn’t matter, lets just be honest with one another”
Sadness is when they’re not ready or too scared to step out of the trap they find themselves in, to move into a genuine honest and unconditional friendship. What they don’t realise that eventually they too will tire of the pretence, lies, cover ups and fantasies and by then it will be too late they will have gone too far and too deep to turn back.
So what does that say about them or us? What sort of society do we live on where we fear to be ourselves and pretend to be someone else? Is it that we feel that we will only be accepted if we are beautiful/handsome, rich, desired or amazing?
I guess the Internet allows people to deal with insecurities in the worst way possible. Rather than trying to be ourselves many have found this medium to hide their true identities and live in a world that while appears fun and amazing you eventually realise its just a painful fantasy that will never come true and one u can never escape from. It’s heaven trapped in hell.
It takes a lifetime to realize many things in life then there are times it takes a split second for everything to hit you smack bang in the face.
Yeah, I know I’ve been away a while but things have been hectic of the past months. A family member is not keeping well. So trips in and out of hospital are now an ongoing thing. I’d love to go into more detail and tell you guys more about it but she reads this blog sometimes so I really have to respect her privacy.
But the stress of it all is sometimes too much to bear and banging heads of walls is not helping either. We are at a stage in the treatment where nothing is working. Time and again we are ending up back to square one with the side effects of each drug taking it’s toll on her body and mind.
It’s amazing how isolated one can feel in an illness when the world is full of ill people. Our weekly trips to the hospital shows just how ill some people are and how worse off. It brings it home that we are lucky our situation isn’t as serious as some but it’s still a situation and we are dealing with it. So each day as it comes is what they always say.
Someone asked the other day how after everything I go through how do I manage to be so strong and keep positive. I guess like always, I’m just grateful for what is positive in my life and try to see the rest as a test.
Other than this dominating our lives at the moment there’s nothing really else to tell you guys.
Oh yeah just remembered the wonderful Facebook deactivated my account so had to make a new one. Please if you were added in my old one or wish to be added in my new account then drop me a request. Miss you all.. here’s the link http://www.facebook.com/aneesa.bashir.71
Not long ago I did a post asking you readers to define what in your opinion was an open relationship…
The reason I asked because as you all know I’m a Facebook freak and through using fb I end up ranting and raving about it. One of the things I noticed was that many guys and girls were using “open relationship” as their relationship status.
I kept thinking how can conservative/religious people and people from strict backgrounds and youngsters be in open relationships, it just didn’t make sense. I know the world is changing but I also know that many can’t be that open minded and then broadcast it openly on Facebook, because let’s face it most of us know what the definition is of an open relationship. If not then here it is…
An open relationship is when you are with someone yet are free to see other people. No, it’s not friends with benefits because this means you are not in a relationship with this person but simply get together when it suits you. Where as, an open relationship is where you are in a relationship with this person but you are also in agreement that it’s ok to see other people. Hope that clears it up for anyone who is having any confusion over this. The poll results I will tell you about in a minute.
So, going back to Facebook, I decided to ask a few of these people what they meant by stating publicly that they are in fact in an open relationship. One guy replied… “It means I am open to a relationship”… I had to stifle my giggles. I tried to explain to him what it really meant but he thought he was right.. so I left him to it… let him be the despo plonker he sounds like…
Ok.. so.. anyway next person… (yeah he did piss me off.. I hate it when people don’t listen to me!) The next person I asked said “It means my relationship is open” This sounded better.. I ventured further and asked what do you really mean? (I thought… he doesn’t look that clever so let’s be sure he knows what he’s talking about) He then told me with great relish it means he is open to have sex with a girl. I asked “Do yo mean lots of girls?” He replies with astonishment “Have you no shame? Of course not… only one girl will be enough! If I can get one… I am open to lots of sex” ok enough said
A few others I asked thought it meant you are bisexual but none who displayed this as their status actually were in open relationships or knew exactly what it meant and not many wanted their partners sleeping with other people.
It was quite a day defining the true meaning to them.. I really should become a lecturer, I think I’d do a grand job!
So the final results of my poll… the question asked was…
A whopping 64% of you knew what the answer was and the rest of you were divided between friends with benefits or open to a relationship with no limits where anything goes. 4% of you thought it meant same sex and another 4% weren’t sure… so all in all most of you are aware of the definition… it’s just numpties on Facebook who don’t have a clue…
I’m fed up with those conversations you hear between people. One starts talking and the other will say “yeah yeah I read all about it on fb” that just kills the conversation.
Fb really has killed the art of conversation between people. It’s like there is nothing left to talk about anymore because everybody already knows your business, even people who you didn’t think read your wall, do. They know more about you than you do.
I know social networks do serve a genuine purpose but I personally do believe they have taken over people’s personal lives too.
Gone were the days gossip was passed word of mouth and bitching was done behind closed doors. Now if you don’t have a fb you’re left out and don’t fit in.
It’s almost used as a reference to every conversation one is having. Either it was on Facebook or you’re told to check fb first before you can be part of the main topic at hand.
So nowadays it’s update yourself on fb goings on and then try to be part of a social circle… Oops sorry fb is the social circle.