Because I’m a princess 🙂 and am in the house most of the day, I have smartened up to a lot of things about stay at home people who have to deal with certain things. In this rant I’m sadly going to have to admit I answer my own phone! Yes! I do!
Don’t be so shocked, close your mouths of shock now and read on. …
Those of you who don’t know what cold calling is, it’s when people just randomly call you to sell you things. Bit like random requests on Facebook lol!! You never know what they have to offer!
Ok, there is nothing new about cold calls, despite the fact we all hate them, despite the fact we are rude to the callers they still keep calling. It’s a fact of life and that’s that. What upsets me is the lack of inventiveness to the callers these days
for example the
“Helloooooo, we are doing a survey”
“don’t worry we are not selling anything”
“I just wanted to ask 2 simple questions”
“As an incentive you may win a FREE gift voucher”
Ooooooo – ok then, go ahead
“Do you own your own home?”
Errrrrrrr – yes (It’s a vanity thing, you have to admit it, don’t you?)
“Great! Now, second question, if you could replace your kitchen, bathroom for FREE which would you pick……….?
Recognise the trap? It won’t be for free and it will mean follow ups very soon. Now what do you do?
My usual one to this question has been “none of them, we have just replaced the lot”.
Needless to say they pack up at that point and you don’t get your FREE voucher!!
So, what are the follow ups to this type of call? Answer the question with “I would probably choose a kitchen” and you will win the “voucher” with the benefit of a follow up call at a later date starting………….
“Helloooooo, you answered a survey a while ago saying you would like to replace your kitchen and we have estimators in your area so we would like the opportunity to give you a FREE estimate for a luxury designer kitchen?”
I don’t need an estimate, they told me how much it would cost.
“Really? Oh, errrrr, so you have had an estimate?”
No, I don’t need an estimate, they told me how much it would cost and you can come and fit the kitchen on Monday please.
“Errrr, I’m a bit confused here, can you confirm the cost they gave you?”
Yes, it was FREE. The question was “if you could replace your kitchen or bathroom for FREE which would you pick” So, I’ll have the FREE kitchen please, is Monday ok with you?
Oh, and while you are on the phone can I order my FREE bathroom too? Make that Tuesday please, we don’t want the workmen getting in each others way.
“I think you misunderstood Sir, it’s not FREE but of course you don’t have to pay the full price because you won the FREE gift voucher which knocks a huge 10% off the price!!!”
Ahhhhhhhh!!!…… ok this may be a strange question but when you do the survey why don’t you say “If you could replace your kitchen or bathroom for several thousand pounds, which would you pick”
“I don’t think that would work from a marketing perspective, I have a feeling most people would just say “no” or hang up”
But the easiest thing would be… is to just bloody say
“No I don’t own my own home… i rent!”
Yeah I know it flippin hurts…… let’s not go there… 😦